Precocious. Little. Clover. Devil

Saturday, November 27, 2004
What is this? A to-do-list?


Driving lesson for this day, 271104 was terrible. 'Nuff said.

Aside from that, I was overwhelmed by invitations for outings. Primary school class outing, Orion platoon 4 outing... I almost had an urge to fling my cellphone out the window this morning especially when the smses just keep coming in. Just a pity it all clashed with the driving lesson.

Anyway, I met the guys from platoon 4 at orchard anyway, had a little chat and headed off to catch The Incredibles with Houf.

But I must admit it was quite an interesting day, and more importantly, a day where I keep bumping into people I know. First the platoon 4 guys, then it was my colleague and later, met Adam as well. Wow. Never has something like that ever happened to me before.

Ah well... The bus ride home from orchard inspired me to go on a photo taking excursion down orchard to take shots of the wonderful christmas decorations. Of course, I has to be done with little or no crowd, otherwise, it'll just be all the more difficult to find the proper space to take the photos.

Did I mention that Raffles hotel looks abosolutely wonderful with the christmas decorations? I guess I just did.

While I'm at it, there's quite a list of things that I want to do.

1. Christmas Photos @ Orchard... Of course with a trip to Raffles hotel. Cannot miss out on that.

2. Must go take photos of that gothic looking building in front of the raffles hospital. Anyone knows what building is that?

3. Watch F1 @ Sepang. Who can resist the excaiment of an F1 race? The heat, the sound of the engines... Oooo! The excitement. Wonder if there will be anyone who'll be interested to go. Am aiming for the 2006 season.

4. Go on a tour to Japan. Need I even elaborate? Kind sponsors are welcomed to contact me. =P

5. Learn how to Scuba dive. Don't it sound fun? If only Singapore had crystal clear waters. That would make this perfect. Sighs... Too bad I haven't found anyone else who's interested...

6. Fishing. Time to bring out my tackle and flies. They've been rotting away since secondary school. Not to mention that NO ONE wants to go fishing. T_T

7. Shoot arrows at plastic boards... Ok... Go to an archery range, though I think they've all closed down.

8. Photo taking @ The Fullerton... Yeah! That's my favourtite hotel in Singapore, and I just love the decor and ambiance of that place.

9. Spent a night at The Fullerton. It going to cost a bomb no doubt...

10. Kayaking 2-star course. Hmm... Not too sure on this one... Dirty water at kallang is a turn off... But I wonder if there's kayaking courses at swimming ools? ;p

Sigh... Many things on the to do list, but no one to accompany me, and not to mention the severe lack of funds.

Oh well, I just remembered iI have more Samurai Champloo episodes to catch., I'm off for the night. (Gah! I suddenly remembered my digital camera is still with my Uncle... I wanna go take those photos bad.)


Gavin pondered @ 22:46


Friday, November 26, 2004
ZzzZzzzZZZzzz


I need rest.

There is a mandatory rest period for a human to recuperate from the rigours of a day, and I have not been meeting that requirement for the past week.

On the bright side, Warrant Jimmy invited me for dinner with the OSC guys... I'm so touched. Also, a certain resolve has been added on my "quest" to return to OSC. The medical appointment is next week and the ineffcient island of Tekong has failed to send my X-rays over to the medical center at SMM. Why am I not surprised?

Driving lessons tomorrow, watcghin the Incredibes too. Going to ball on Sunday, and meet up with my drama juniors. Looks to be a good weekend ahead.


Gavin pondered @ 21:29


Thursday, November 25, 2004
I need some sleep


Make that ALOT of sleep


Gavin pondered @ 21:12


Monday, November 22, 2004
You just gotta love Dettol~


First, I'd like to congratu;ate Dettol for creating such a wonderful anti-bacterial detergent. Yes, the stupid footrot has subsided considerable after I washed my feet with that wonderful Dettol. So much for the antiseptic powder from SAF... It's good, but compared to Dettol? There's no fight.

That aside, life's going to get pretty busy just about right now. There's going to be so many things I have to do and so little time! Usually, I have about an hour or 2 before sleeping to just "stone" about, but now? I drop dead on the bed after midnight and fall asleep immediately, tired from doing so many things.

But that's agood sign, it makes life more fun-filled. Just try not to run my batteries flat, I try to tell myself, but I think I already overdid things. I felt like a beehive was in my head today, and the eyes? they were predominatly on "slumber mode", same goes for my brain. Something tells me that I should NEVER attend that many driving lessons in 2 days. At least, it's fun while driving during lessons, but afterwards? The leg's aching, the eyes are tired and you're just basically drained.

Driving requires great concentration, and with great concentration comes great mental exhaustion.


Gavin pondered @ 20:54


Saturday, November 20, 2004


Looking back at the list I made last night, you'd figure why it is so hard to get presents that a guy really wants. It's not that he won't want anything, just that it's going to be too darn expensive to afford.

Ah well... It's a reminder that christmas is coming soon. Yeah! Hope this year's would be wonderful.

Sigh... Once again, it shall be a far cry from my dream christmas. Just once, I would like to experience my dream christmas. I have 2 dream christmas, one's practically impossible, because it would involve myself being in a fantasy world. Actually I imagine that dream "insert occasion here" for most occasions, but it can only exist in my head.

The other one would be to spend it with my soul mate. A christmas morning where, she suddenly calls me up in the morning, and we meet for breakfast...... Hey... If I write it down, then it won't be a surprise anymore.... -_-"

Ok... I'm just not thinking right after buying all that books today...


Gavin pondered @ 22:19


Friday, November 19, 2004


2 weeks more. Yes, and then I can begin the journey back to OSC. I hope the medical board won't take long after the appointment with the specialist. Till then I'm going to just have to wait. But it's all worth it.

Anyways, My hair's long wenough to style so I'll be heading down to the hair stylist to get it done tomorrow. After that it's going to be driving lessons.

And I've decided on a list of things to buy within these two years of NS... That is assuming I manage to save up enough to afford them.

1. SONY VIAO TR (PCG-TR5GP, 10.6" screen!!! A whooping $3500)
2. iPOD
3. New handphone
4. My own car(A guy's entitled to dream, no?)
5. ATI X900 graphics card
6. Wireless keyboard
7. A new watch
8. A palm top
9. Books, books and more books!


Gavin pondered @ 23:19


Tuesday, November 16, 2004
Angel of Death: Value of life


When Gareth was still a harbinger of death, he once said. "The more I learn of men, only increases the mystery of their ways."

The autumn breeze blows the oak tree leaves, rustling layers of the year gone past. Fish paint the blue stream canvass, the signs of life abundant in bloom. The lazy sun rests behind the silky clouds, sparing the earth it's scorching fury. How peaceful it is, this time of year, a time of rest.

Except for this cottage in clearing. Work is being carried out. The cries of desperation, the cries of fear, clear and loud in the cool autumn breeze. What work goes on? Speculate, we only can.

Let's us ignore that noisy little cottage, and follow the stream. Trace its path till a bridge spans the water. There is where the focus of our story should come to rest. For the moment just imagine a man, to be more exact the kind of man you take a look at and form no opinion at all. He reminds you of nothing, he resembles nothing. Neither attractive nor repulsive, just plain unassuming. However, on further examination, he speaks of innumerable winters, and expounds a loneliness that inexorably leaves you in awe, and at that instant, that feeling fades back to a mere mediocrity.

His name is Gareth.

He watches the fish. Gareth likes it that way, no one bothers to ask him to explain his fascination with fish. If they did bother to ask, they will find out it is not an obsession with fish, but a fascination with life. What's there not to be fascinated with life, Gareth always said. More so considering the trials God puts it through. Gareth admired it's unrelenting resilience, even in the face of a inevitable demise, the end of it's time, known as death.

Gareth gazed dreamily through the stream, as deeper thoughts slowly filled his consciousness, until he was interuppted a black figure upon the stout oak. A raven looked curiously at the strange man on the bridge.

The raven is considered to be the messenger of death in many cultures around the world. That belief is not entirely accurate, nor is it entirely baseless. In general, birds are always attracted to the presence of Gareth, you see, Angels produce a harmonic balance in the immediate surroundings which birds find particularly soothing. In fact, not just birds, all living things feel it, they notice it. Dogs always bark incessantly in his presence and cats though they could not be bothered with making much noise, they always stare at him. Man never understood this feeling, so they ignore it. The part about ravens? That's just prejudice on man's part.

"It's time"

Gareth started off in the bearing off the cottage.

-------
Chester started on the task at hand, he motioned two the 2 audience present to approach the table. A short introduction to the collection of shiny trinkets, all different manner of blades designed specifically to cut up flesh, and the two guests weighed the instruments in their hands.
Deft strokes to gauge the balance, distinguished these two men as adroit warriors. Men who were as much in their element as a cat in the river. Then again, it is not for Chester to be judging others, after all, his responsibilty is to impart on them his knowledge and skills.
Wishing no further delay, Chester picked out his favourite. With the poise and calm of an expert He slowly approached the figure lying upon the table. Bound and gagged no less. Don't want any struggling do we?

Then the door opened. The two men looked at the late comer with slight disdain and focused their attention on the table once again. Chester nodded at the newcomer and welcomed him.
Gareth smiled in a show of friendship. He learnt years ago that a smile was a sign men considered as a display of non-aggression. So he had learnt to use it as well.
And just as well that Chester could not care less. A deep breath later, the task at hand commenced. Chester the great surgeon performed the dissection of the chimpanzee with the slightest of efforts. Skin, flesh and bone come apart with the bare minimum of bloodshed. As two men watched on in awe, Gareth only watched.
The lungs of the primate laid exposed as it still carried out it's function, The men lauded Chester for his mastery of the craft, imploring him to begin his lecture on the respiratory system. 3 men discussed the inner workings at length, while Gareth stood on the spot, deep in thought.
He asked. "Why must men sacrifice a life for the purpose of amusement?
Chester looked him in the eye and corrected. "Not amusement my good fellow, but for the sake of progress, we must have a platform upon which we could hone our skill."
In unison the two men said. "Agreed, agreed, how else can surgeons perfect their craft?
Gareth then proceeded to inquire. But why must you use the life of an ape?"
Chester regarded this young lad with a questioning stare. "Why, my lad, surely you would not advocate the sacrifice of a human life? Of course we use an ape's life! How can we use a human soul for such purposes? Surely you are not equating an ape to a man?"
Gareth shrugged his shoulders. "But a life is a life, given to men, to apes, to all that lives, life is one and life is all, a life is still a life. Surely you do not imply that one man's life is two ape's life?
Chester laughed at the young lad's folly. Dear boy, according to such logic, would it not be fair to suggest that men should harvest the flesh of men for consumption."
Gareth felt no flaw in that logic, but was interupted by Chester.
Chester continued. "You see, in such situations, a life has to be forgone, but would men rather let another men die? For men would alwaysside with men, it is within his nature to be inclined to his own kind."
Gareth thought for a while almost on the verge of enlightenment when he hit upon a dead end. "Then pray tell why do men butcher each other in the act of murder? Is it not true that men are the greatest killer of men?"
Chester smiled at the young lad. "Yes, you are not wrong. Man would of course kill another as easily as he would take the life of another animal. Man will do anything to protect himself, but not the whole race of men. Man fears daeth, but he will try to disguise that fear. Hide it from the world, and more importantly, from other men. That is why man will create 'morals', to teach other men not to kill. However, it is in hope that their own life wll not be threatened. Man would never show his vulnerability, not to other men, and most importantly not to death."
Gareth face was transfixed with incomprehension. What was there to fear about him? It is not like he would cauuse them any pain.
Gareth thanked Chester and excused himself, he walked out the door and trailing him, a pale spectre of the ape. Gareth looked it in the eye and asked it. "Am I that horrifying? Do I look scary to you"
The ape just stared him blankly.
Gareth ushered it along. "I don't understand them either. Come along, let us get a move on." The ape followed him obediently.

At times like this, Gareth always felt that life existed just to spite him. He sighed.


Gavin pondered @ 19:55


Monday, November 15, 2004
LCD screen!


So I headed down to Funan this morning to go monitor shopping. As expected, the CRT monitors are a rare breed, which helped reinforce my decision to purchase a LCD monitor to my parents. Albeit much complaining and grumbling on my parents' part about having to spend money. It's lucky I didn't ask for a new computer, I'm just saving that "shiock" to when I go to University and need to buy a laptop. Yes, the one I'm aiming for is the SONY VIAO with the 12" screen, super small, super sleek, my kib\nda laptop.

Of course, we ended up buying a LCD monitor. DArn... wanted to get the LG one with the cool blue power switch, but it was sold out. Curses...

So we ended up buying a philips one. It's got the DVI port, which it's causing me one minor headache.

Can anyone explain to me why some games say that it's unable to initialize Direct 3D when my video output mode is switched to digital? I don't really understand why such a problem should arise. Ah well... I'll just set it to digital and turn it back to analog when I want to play those games.

LCD is cool. Have I mentioned how pictures seem to look much better on LCD screens? Weird huh? Especially considering that professionals do not advocate the use of LCD monitors because it compromises upon image quality.

Ah well, just as long as I'm happy with that super slim, new device on my computer table, it sdoesn't really matter. From now on, If I'm going to buy a new computer, I'll choose one with a LCD monitor.(Although I think tht in the future, CRTs would be phased out)


Gavin pondered @ 19:26


Sunday, November 14, 2004


The most amazing thing happened a while ago. While flipping channels, I happened to switch to Arts Central, and there was this gentleman on a stage performing a song while playing a piano. Immediately, my mind clicked and it said "Billy Joel."

It was of course Billy Joel.

But you know the most incredible part about that? I only heard one of his songs before and have neevr seen any of his pictures. Wow... Goes to show his vocals are so unique that I could link it to that one song and recognize the singer.

And watching the remainder of the programme, I thought "Hey, that guy's pretty good!"

Maybe it's just me and my love for music which uses accoustic/classical instruments, but his singing together with the piano sounded really good to me.

Don't you just find music without excessive electronical sounds sound that little bit more pristine and clear? Well, at least I do.(That being said, I just contradicted myself, because all music that has been recorded is techinically "electronic" when it is replayed on a radio... Hmmm)
Well, I guess you'll have to excuse me while I continue watching the show.


Gavin pondered @ 22:15



Computer's acting up...


I have a nagging suspicion that the computer in my room is sending electrical surges to it;s graphics card slot. The original graphics card always had a proble of suddenly shutting itself down for no apparent reason, and today, the NEW graphics card shut itself down too. I'm like WTH? Can't be the graphics card;s problem, it's new...

Ah well... Anyways, after like 2 hours of tinkering with the hardware, it's back to normal, for now. I don't know if it's just a temporary "fix". I just hope I have solved the problem... Otherwise, it might mean I have to go purchase a new computer.

Ah well, I'll give it a week and see how it works out. If it's bad, then I'll have to try to convince my Dad to get a new com, which I would really like. The current com's already 3 years old, and it's already living on "borrowed" time, meaning it's only surviving because I've started to change it's parts.

First the DVD playing capabilities went, next it was the graphics card... I wonder what will go next.


Gavin pondered @ 01:04


Friday, November 12, 2004
I have no idea why I'm writing about this


Talking about the past today. Why? Because it was a stupid idea not to allow us to take an off . It's dumb, I swear. A public holiday on Thursday, come back on Friday, and a long weekend due to the public holiday on monday. The whole day was spent just talking, talking and talking. *Records another piece of the inability of the SAF to function properly*

The recent death of Arafat has resulted in an overwhelming influx of articles on him and documentary programmes on the late Palestine leader. It's only a mater of time before a biography emerges. But one thing's rather clear to me. The life of the deceased appears to be more interesting thatn it actually was.

It's a interesting curiousity, that man tends towards beautifying th past. Past events always have a layer of memory, some nostalgia, a little pinch of imagination and a tiny dash of good story-telling.

That ain't that bad really, adds more flavour to events, unless of course you are in need of only the factual truths.

The past always appeals to us because of it's quality of only existing in our memories. The brain is an amazing filter which sieves out all the little unneccessary events, and expertly links events like a time lapse camera, making it fit much more seamlessly than when it happened. Very simply, the little waiting periods, little sidetracks and other minor diviations and blemishes are also systematically blotted out.

Yeah, I like the past.

But like anyone can tell you, it is for the future that we must live for.



Gavin pondered @ 22:40


Saturday, November 06, 2004
My baby cousin is sooo cute!


In the morning after settling the driving lesson thingy, I finally got to watch my first NBA game of the 04-05 season, the Memphis Grizzles against the Houston Rockets. The Rockets won, thanks to some handy work from McGrady.

After that, I went to visit my Uncle at Bishan cause it's my baby cousin's 1-month party. Her name's Rianne, and she's so small and cute!! I can't wait to post her pictures up, but gotta wait till my Aunt sends them to me. Rianne is just so adorable... And she's like camera shy. Whenever we try to carry her to take a photo, she turns away fromt eh camera, and when we give up and point it somewhere else, she'll look at the person holding the camera.

Next. I shall describe the most incomprehensible part of my day. I spent a total of $170 today just on books! Yes... Books... What was I thinking? Ah well... It's all worth it, especially the Discworld picture book. I so love that series, and I recommend Terry Pratchet to anyone who's looking for a good read.

Darn... I spent $170... Still can't believe it.


Gavin pondered @ 22:58


Thursday, November 04, 2004
Haagen-Dazs Cookies and Cream... Mmmm...


Have I ever mentioned how good that Ice-cream tastes? If I haven't, now I am! =) It's one of my favorite flavors from Haagen-Dazs, save for the Belgian Chocolate. Then agian... I think I've been binging on food that past week... That's not a good thing. It's especially bad when you think you can actually feel that extra weight been added slowly to your body. Gotta... Get... A grip on... myself! Can't ruin my fitness regime. Too much chocolate, tortilla chips and stuff... Sigh... No lunch for me tomorrow. Just fruits would suffice. That applies to the next week, and maybe the week after that. Oh well...

Anyways, the new template is up after weeks of tweaking and with a little help from Yingmei on the background image. Something still feel wrong though. I've always wanted a white template... But the images I have to work with don't allow for that provision, thus this would have to suffice, of course until the perfectionist streak emerges and the flaws in this template glare straight into my eyes, like how a blue apple would stand out among a basket of red apples. Oh well... No one ever said anything would last forever, and there seems to be no logic in mulling over this tiny detail. It's just that something just feels wrong. It's the text. I just know it.

Speaking of wrong, there apparently is an intrinsic "wrongness" that abounds in the tiny universe that comprises what I call my reality. If I lost some people with that statement, I'd like to reiterate that in plain simple english. I attract bad things.

In a short span of 2 days, the ineffable has been invoked twice. No... with this entry... make it 3 times. It's pretty frustating experience I say, and it always finds a way to slowly slip into oblivion only to suddenly find a secret backdoor back into my life. I'm like ". . ." It's like this sick little trick of fate etched deep into the very fabric of my existence.

Not that it would be a particularly unique experience. Life's filled with many little twists of fates. Very much like how some people will always be caught in the rain, or always steeping unto puddles of mub. These little tricks of fate plague me, but non so inexorable as the ineffable one.

Conversely, it is equally likely and possible that subconciously, I am allowing the ineffable to occur. The remote likelihood that the mind is so sensitive that every little thing could be picked up and linked back to the ineffable. *Shrugs*

It's just comforting to know that whatever the case, there will come a day when it all will be resolved. I call it the day of "confrontational escapism" the day that it either confronts me straight in the face or just cease to exist anymore. Heh... That's a great ambiguous way to put it, ain't it? But look closely at it again, and find that it expounds Universal truth. One that applies to every event. Either it gets you involved in it or it will not bother you at all. Beautiful truth. Simple yet so profound. The hard part lies in the ability to be ignored by all the bad events. I wish I had that power.


Gavin pondered @ 22:17



2 books in 4 days... Hmm...


For some very weird resons, I could not access my blog last night... As a result, a whole tonne of creativity went down the drain.

Ok, I exagerate, but I was intending to resume writing the book of Windsong last night. Just as well that i went to sketch the rough plan of Ashgarn.

I don't like keeping secrets, and wone day, I am just going to blurt it out. Then perhaps the SAF will then try to court martial. What the heck. I didn't ask for all this.

That's not saying everything's bad. It's quite fine really. It's a opportunity only a select few get. Heck, I think I've said too much.

There's so much activity in my brain, and woderful pictures are being painted. It's been a while since I've felt this alive!

The new NBA season has also commmenced, and that of course means there'll be basketball to watch! Hopefully work can resume on "Basketball Story."

That leaves "Angel of Death", definitely going to be work on that too. Reading about Death in the discworld series have added further insights and a deeper understanding of how an agent of death might actually think.

These 3 babies of mine have been neglected and I truly am sorry, but things are going to change around here. Work is going to be done!


Gavin pondered @ 20:15


Monday, November 01, 2004
Book of Windsong


In the journals of time, through the dust of the ages, one man has left his mark like no other. Undeniably, he is the greatest traveler in the history of the lands, and concurrently one of the most prominent wizard. He is the vagrant mage, Windsong.

He alone, is responsible for the doumentation of the Vast Outer Realms, and it is he who brought knowledge to the people of the Great Border Wall and the Gal'Bolrye Divide.

Seeking to learn the secrets of the land, Windsong's travels heralded the great age of exploration, and leaving in his footsteps, learning and discovery. His great journey, is widely accepted to come from his journal, titled "the hundred year quest". Most of the records come from copies and excerpts from that ancient tome, yet none remained of his original text. Lost in time, they all say. Historians and geographers alike seek the ultimate prize - The book of Windsong himself.

Little do they understand the futility of their search, for it is pointless and at most, a meaningless exercise. The book has never been lost, it's whereabouts have merely been a well kept secret and at the same time, an elaborate lie. However, on this day, it's marvels will be revealed once again.

Behold before the great portrait of it's author, upon the sacred pedestal lies the crystallization of a centuries' enlightenment. Behold in it's full glory the leather bound tome, whose mere existence could transform the most noble of gentlemen into the most savage wolf.

It is written:

The twin moons guide the the sparkling stream cutting deep the verdant fields, seeking the River Amberit. Over the rich soil the waters surge, cutting stone with the immense strength of time. It roars towards the falls where it plunges a thousand feet and feeding the source of life, with a sound of a hundred weeping gods.

The life stream enriched with tears of gods is drawn towards the mighty Gates of Dawn, for which mark out the golden land of mighty Ashgarn. Land as ancient as the Amberit. Land of the proud King, with Knights by right and Mage by left, the two mighty guilds lay flesh and blood for King and throne.

It was said of this land, a birth through fire and brimstone, when the flame from above scorched these hallowed grounds. So it is said. That in time too long ago, fire rained as the star met the earth, and thus our glorious kingdom the labor of their searing embrace. That star, the legends say her name was "Ash" and so bestowed on our land the name of our mother. Ashgarn, the child of he celestial star Ash.

These legends I have been told whence I once played upon the fields, and now I shall seek prove that shall bring legends into the light. To justify my theory that aeons in time, there once came a star from the sky. The star that would left a mark on the ancient grounds of our land.

Thus began my journey, and the night when the twin moons shone their brightest, I bid my wife and son a tearful parting, for the peak of the crying mountain shall be my destination.
----------
The sacred crying mountains, were the source of water to the children of Ashgarn, the endless well of the land, for the mountain has for centuries provided the people with their supply of water. It is the source of life that sires the 3 great rivers, without which Ashgarn cannot prosper.
It is there I believe lies the key to the questions in my head.
But first, I must travel.
Across the Y'lae fields, I rode for 6 days. There I saw the grazing herds. These curious creatures spend their life grazing on the verdant grass, nary a care in the world, and rightly so in the Savannah hey rule. What confounded my mind then, was the lack of water. Rivers, none to be seen, yet the grass grew indeed, and the grazing gazelles were not a mere figment of a wild imagination.


Gavin pondered @ 21:18


Under the layers of dust