Friday, December 31, 2004
Happy New Year~!
Yes, the New year is upon us, and we wish 2004 a last farewell as it takes it's little place in the annuals of time.
Recieved news that I'm going to be back in OSC, so that's a good start. Yeah, that's a great start to the day!
Had an excellent feast at Neub's place, which included wonderful sausages, turkey and the ever elusive pasta! Yeah, the pasta that escaped us on several occasions at neub's place. I tell you, Neub's Mom's pasta is wonderful, especially the meatballs. Thatk's to the feast, I'm totally stuffed now.
Anyways, just downloaded firefox and I'll be trying it out, so, wishing everyone a happy new year, I'm off~
Gavin
pondered @ 23:48
Tuesday, December 28, 2004
I'M BORED WITH LIFE!
Having nothing to do at camp, is the worst test of my sanity. I feel worthless. What's killing me is fr0m the inside and I cannot fathom how much longer it will have to be. My talents and abilities, are not being utilized, and a great waste if only they knew.
Let them go on stifling me, only, they will soon realize that they have lost out, not me.
Sigh... I want a girlfriend... At least she can bitch about her day to me. It kills time.
Killing Time: The Observatory
killing time killing time
don’t really know what to do?
sad is the man who lives by the sea
wasting time wasting time
watching as nothing goes by
sad is the man with an empty life
killing time killing time
long is the passage of time
sad is the man with an absent mind
beating time beating time
run as the wind goes by
sad is the man who is tired of life
so sad is the man
so sad is the man
sad is the man who lives by the sea
sad is the man who lives by the sea
killing time killing time
older the sea gets each day
sad is the man who has walked away
passing time passing time
never once stopping to stay
sad is the man who has lost his way.
What an excellent description of the little existential quandary I find myself in. Maybe it's a phase all NSFs go through? Afterall, we do not have a choice over what we do in NS. It's all a matter of psycological tests and subjective opinions formed of you as a person. Never have I seen a system more biased then this, going to the extent of having one and all categorized and labelled.
Crap.
Maybe Leslie found inspiration for this song through this little sick joke of a Singaporean system for excellence. Don't leave everything to the unknowns, make sure all is well planned and calculated. Then my friends, what is a life is only to be lived for a dictated path.
So what if I have everything, who cares? What I want is more than just that.
I can't keep deluding myself that I love this life. I can't. I want challenges, I want to do things without having to adhere to stupid rules. Hell... Send me on a rescue mission to Indonesia, I don't mind. Just relieve me of all the F***ing regimentation and spare me the bureaucracy.
Gavin
pondered @ 22:21
Sunday, December 26, 2004
Hmmm... You guys should try soaking your feet in a tub of warm water. It's such a wonderful experience. Add in a little dettol and you'll have a comfortable soak and at the same time, clean, germ free feet.
Christmas is over and the new year looms. Maybe loom is too strong a word to use, after all, there's no menace in a new year. 2004 is coming to a close in a week, and in this year, a year has passed, taking away the colours, and emotions that marked it's passage. It's a year quite unlike others. I've changed alot, and I seek to undo those changes, for they are not all for the better.
Next years, will be the first year of adulthood. No more a teen, and I don't really know what to expect.
Gavin
pondered @ 21:54
Saturday, December 25, 2004
Merry Christmas!
MERRY Christmas to everyone! Have a wonderful holiday season, people, and may all your dreams come true in the festive cheer~!
Gavin out! Busy, busy!
Gavin
pondered @ 17:58
Wednesday, December 22, 2004
Wow!
Just when I thought that advertisements were hopeless these days? This came along a proved me wrong.
Genius ain't it? =)
Gavin
pondered @ 21:07
Sunday, December 19, 2004
Baking cake!
A little bakery was my kitchen this day, as I baked a cake, an Orang Chiffon cake to be exact. Know, it's not as tough as I always thought it to be, be it does that a little time and effort.
Basically, the recipes is as follows:
Orange Chiffon Cake:
6 large egg, separated plus 1 additional egg white
2 1/4 cups (225 grams) sifted cake flour
1 1/2 cups (300 grams) superfine white (castor) sugar
1 tablespoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup (120 ml) vegetable oil or safflower oil
3/4 cup (180 ml) freshly squeezed orange juice (2 - 3 large Navel Oranges)
2 tablespoons (10 grams) orange zest
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
3/4 teaspoon cream of tartar
First goes the sifting of the flour, which for me involved some baking instrument which shook up and filtered the flour. According to my Mom, a sieve works as well, but it's faster using that sifting cup. After that, the flour went into the mixing bowl and on goes the mixer, and while the mixer is on low, the sunflower oil is added into the flour, together with the sugar. Then, the eggs are added, followed by the vanila essence. I was a little worried at thios point of time because the mix was forming large flour gobules, due to the lack of water, this is where the oragne juice comes in. It not only acts as the solvent(or medium to form a suspension of flour and the other ingredients... can't balme me... I'm a science student) it also imparts the orange flavour into the cake, of course, the addition of the orange zest further enhances the citrus taste.
When it's nicel mixed, switch the bowls to mix the egg white. Mix till it's fluffy and add the cream of tartar. When that mixture is able to "stand," add it to the previously prepared flour mixture and mix well, keeping in mind not to stir too quickly, least the air in the mixture escapes and it turns runny.
Then it goes in the oven! SImple eh? And I'm, rather proud of myself! =D
Gavin
pondered @ 19:32
Saturday, December 18, 2004
In rememberance
This post is dedicated to Mr. John Lim, recently deceased in a car accident in New Zealand.
He was one of the most friendly teachers I knew, and I liked his style. Easy going, and fun to be around. Such a young man should not have his life ended so soon, but we have to accept the facts.At least, he has left a lasting impression on his students, and in our memory he will live on.
Thank you for all you've given to us.
Gavin
pondered @ 22:11
Thursday, December 16, 2004
8 more days to christmas
I'm a little on the exhausted side, with much gratitude to the absurdly long distance from Nee Soon camp to my home. Consecutively being hit with the arduos task of having to attend the trial test for the Final Theory tesat on wednesday and tuesday, and of course, culmulating/culminating(I could not recall which word was correct. Turns out both could be used, how wonderful! So I'm going to leave it in that form) in today's test. I'm totally burnt out, and drained, although the culprit is actually the lack of rest.
Such a hectic pace of life has it's own thrills to. Always being on the move, it leaves you with little time to go thinking about all the little unnecessary worries. However, I did get rather paranoid late today. *Shrugs* Ever so often I get this impulse to detest the people around me, this is especailly true when I start to feel claustrophobic, ie being on a crowded bus or having to walk through huge crowds. I do not really like strangers and naturally, my disposition towards them, or rather, my thoughts on them can't be very pleasant.
Ah well... 8 mre days to christmas, and I don't have reason to believe the crowd on the streets would subside... but... It can't be helped, it's Christmas! =)
It's beginning to look a lot like christmas!
Gavin
pondered @ 21:41
Tuesday, December 14, 2004
I shall christen thee 13
Hmm... So I've have got Alpha-Thalassemia traits, but my haemoglobin count is above average. Yeah, so the MO says that I don't have the disease, but I probably carry the chromosome which might lead to thalassemia.
Simply put? If my future wife has the same chromosome(biology students, think in terms of recessive genes, it's something close), our kids are going to have a very high chance of being afflicted with the illness. So, great for me and not too great for my descendents...*shrugs*
On a more sombre note, Mr. John Lim's death was reported in today's papers, good bless him, and may he rest in peace. It's such a shame a nice guy such as he would have his life ended so soon. Might head down to his wake if I find out where and when.
Had a very weird and intense dream last night. Faceless was in it again(for the uninitiated, faceless is a girl who appeared on occasions in my dreams, but I can never make out her face. I'm assumiong she's probably my projection of my soulmate.), however, for the first time ever, she was not faceless anymore. Since she appeared on the night of the 13th of December, I find it only appropriate to now dubbed her 13.
Everytime 13's around in my dreams, I would experience a little glimpse of how being around my soul mate would feel. It's so serene, and yet intense. In last night's dreams, it ran the theme of sacrifice. Went something like she went through great pains just to find me, cause for some reason we were seperated.
Anyway, I feel bad for 13 even though she might be a fictional character. Seems like everytime she's around, she'll have to suffer... Ah well. It's just a dream.
Gavin
pondered @ 21:40
Sunday, December 12, 2004
I lied......*Sheepish*
Well... I bought the iPod, the ipodmini to be exat. Oh well~
*Starts smiling at anything and everything*
Let the christmas joy spread to everyone~! =D
Gavin
pondered @ 20:36
Saturday, December 11, 2004
Ooo... Chroistmas is slowly creeping in on us as we still wait for the portends to indicate it's arrival. I must admit it is indeed a little quiet for this time of the year. There is just something lacking, as though everyone has forgotten about christmas? It's too quiet, and I'm feeling a little dampened.
Maybe it's a pretty good indication that all the evil corporationshave lost interest in cashing in on christmas, thuis sparing it the dubious honour of being a commercial festival. Converesely, it also means less effort on the big corporations' part to decorate Singapore and infuse the vital catalyst to kick start the jolly yuletide cheer. It's a interesting yet paradoxical symbiotic relationship.
Interlude: Ok... They just showed a christmas advertisement on TV. Looks like the people who want to make money out of christmas still want their dough.
I'm not a particularly religious person, that fact I must clarify. However for some reasons beyond my own comprehension, I do staunchly believe in the spirit of christmas. "I just like the ideals of christmas" I often say, and what is there not to like about a tim of spreading joy and laughter? It is a season of cheer and a time to make one and all happy.
Christmas is a beautiful festival both in spirit and in aesthetics. The images of christmas trees, snowy white exapnses, with the faint jingliong of the bells on the sleigh up in the clouds. I like how that picture forms in my mind.
And this year, I'm going to give myself the ultimate Christmas present, an iPoD! Yes! I will buy it when the pay for January comes in, which will be in approximately a month! I can't wait!
Countdown to iPod, 30 days!
Gavin
pondered @ 19:55
Wednesday, December 08, 2004
Incomprehensible
The more you try to restrict me, the more I will break free. No chains will tie me down, unless I resign myself to their restraint. I answer to no one, but only to myself, and never to answer for the obviously redundant.
I'm a silent warrior and in silence lies my strength. I'll climb the highest peak and brave the fiercest winds but I don't wish to tell the world the whole long journey.
Just the trill alone is what I seek, and don't assume that I'm so weak. Let me walk my path, it's not so tough. Assumption is that I always know not what's best for me, but know what's best for me do they?
They are holding on too tight. No breath, no air, I cannot breathe.
The world is just so incomprehensible.
Just don't go and cramp my style. I'm not who they think I am, I am not who I seem to be. This is my story, and I write the book. Don't try to snatch the pen from me.
Gavin
pondered @ 20:50
Monday, December 06, 2004
Marry a HIV free spouse
First, I'd like to congratulate the government of Singapore for breaking new ground in the art of policy making. In a bold move, the government has defied all odds by announcing that it will consider implementing compulsory health screening for couples before they get registered at the Registry of marriages.
Well done, and you have my upmost admiration for once again demonstrating how seriously uptight Singaporeans can get. Admit it, we are all just a bunch of control freaks. Everything must proceed according to plan, and we must have knowledge of every parameter. I wonder what will happen when it is one day revealed that "change is the only constant."
Just imagine the oanic on the faces of everyone? Or maybe not, maybe our almighty government has already had provisions for such an event.
Seriously, you have to applaude the government for being so efficient and effective that people complain of it being too restrictive and capable. Hey, at least it does things right unlike a certain democracy with the star and stripes *Ahem*USA*Ahem*
You know, I'd really like to see this scenario in my life-time: The government out-sourcing the governance of a nation to the private sector. Now that would be a great sight to behold, and not tto mention, the greatest farce of all time, though I suspect by that point of time, the idea would be an acceptable on, just like any majorly unconformist idea that existed decades ago that have been assimilate into acceptance as absolutely normal ideas.
That's how it all works. Just give it time, and the stubborn nature of humans will eventually wear down. Just like how cloning and stem cell research would be a widespread industry in approximately 25 years? I'm no Nostrodamus, but something tells me that is going to be the case anyways.
Gavin
pondered @ 20:26
Sunday, December 05, 2004
Spent 5 minuts watching a sunbird trying to peck at the clothes hanging inthe kitchen balcony. Little thing probably mistook one of the clothes for a flower. To be exact it wass pecking at a pink bra. Maybe it feeds on pink flowers. I don't know. Tried to get it to land on my finger but it was too cautious around my presence and eventually flew away.
So much for that distraction.
What I really want to write dwells on pain. Alright, I kid, I am not so glum, but pain is what I'm in now, physical pain that is. Muscles aroudn the shoulders, triceps, deltoids are aching, and the legs are pleading for mercy. The head is feeling rather tipsy and I expect I'm dehydrated. No, I have not been involved in a fight,the lungs are also making quite a ruckus. Above mentioned are merely the after effects of basketball.
The headaches subsiding now as the fluids are being replenished. As I leaned back to lie on the floor for a little rest, my back submitted a complaint letter as well. Ah well I must start training myself to play through intense physical punishment, of which I seem to be on the receving end quite a bit these days.
Then there remains a question? Why do I do this even though it causes such great physical suffering?
It's called love.
Interrupted. Kheng Hwee called while he was on prowling. Guard duty on a weekend... tsk, tsk. After the talk, I was slightly enlightened on something, but I guess it's a little late to know that. Anyways, talked for about half an hour, and now it's back to writing this entry.
Love for the game, that's what drives me to push myself to play, even though every game brings me one step closer to the last game I'll ever play. I just love it too much to quit. What is the pain compared to the fruits of basketball. It is not just a game, it is a TEAM game. I lvoe making those assists, I love hustling for the ball, I love making the key steal, and of course, I like to shoot the ball. Even though I'm not a good player, I just love this game.
Love hurts don't it?
Makes me wonder if indeed hurt and pain are inseperable components of love.
Think about it, mothers experience so much pain when they give birth to their children. Later in life, parents would often find that their children would inadvertedly cause them great pains and frustration among other things.
The same applies to us. If we really love someone, chances are, we have been hurt by them on countless occassions. So what makes us continue to love? I believe that love would require a certain special event to occur between the two parties. For the parent and child, it's pretty obvious. Between friends, the strongest friendships are always forged through certain events, special events might I add.
I mean think about it, have your buddies not gone through shit with you? Might I even add that fear is one of the trigger for many of the relationships around us.? It's just a little hypotesis of mine, but ever heard stories of bringing your date to a horror movie? Or how about your buddy bing the only friend who helped ou when you were in serious trouble? How about those relationships forged on the basis of life-and-death situations, those are perhaps the strongest form of bonding you could ever find.
It's just a very little innovation of nature so that your friends, or loved ones would be able to protect you when you really are in danger.
Might I further surmise that failed marrigaes have no such defining moment in the course of the reationship. It's a bold assumption but could people be so preoccupied with finding love that they jump into a relationship that they have no confidence of mantaining till the ends of time.
Anyway, the freaking headache is back... so I'll be off here.
Gavin
pondered @ 18:28
Saturday, December 04, 2004
The driving lesson evaluation for today? Excellent! Finished 5 sections and I'm on to module 2 already. It was fortunate that I was under the tutelage of two very nice instructors.
The car's controls feel quite very natural to me now, the braking power, the sound of the biting point, feel of the revs, it's all coming naturally to me. Too bad there's no possibility of me practicing on my own. No matter, as long as I can fly through the roads, I will feel that rush. That trance-like state where I'm not even consciously thinking of driving. There was once I unknowingly shifted to 3rd gear and was travelling right over the limit at close to 75km/h. Had the instructor worried for a while there, and of course I slowed down. =p
Anyway, I left the driving center feeling very pleased and headed doewn to kallang to meet up with Waihoh and Tim to go Kayaking. It's been awhile since the course, but hey, at least I can still make the kayak travel in a straight path.
Although the day's session was tiring, it felt good. Just floating along on the Kallang basin, and just taking in the sights. I must say that the Shear's Bridge is quite a sight to behold. Tim and Waihoh proceeded outside the boundaries of the Shear's Bridge, but I chose to stay in. Not entirely confident that I can hold my own in the open seas.
In conclusion? Today was great!
Gavin
pondered @ 19:52
Thursday, December 02, 2004
Will there be a day... Like this?
Will there be a day when I can no longer play basketball? Even on a wheelchair, I will still lvoe the game.
This scan's taken from the manga, REAL by Takehiko Inoue, the same
sensei who created the wonderful Slam Dunk series.
REAL's also a basketball based manga, which is Inoue
sensei's latest work, following his "Vagabond," the story based on the samurai Miyamoto Musashi.
REAL's a story about 3 teenagers who can no longer play basketball due to injury or paralysis. However, they still yearn for the feeling of being able to ball again, and of course, they try all means and methods just to be able to lace up and just play ball.
I'm not too clear on the names of the 3 guys though, but in hanyu pinyin, they're "ye gong peng mei", "hu chuan qing chun" and "gao qiao jiu xing." There's only 3 books so far, but like all previous works, REAL is an emotionally intense manga, which so engages the reader that the reader cannot help but feel for the characters.
It's one good manga(so far) and I shall no provide too many spoilers for you guys. Definitely worth a read.
Gavin
pondered @ 21:38
My scanner's down
Some error which the other com is unable to initialize the scanner, and I'm not too keen on shifting it over to this room and testing it.
Oh well, I did shift it over afterall... Heh. It's working... Weird.
Well, the reason I wanted to use the scanner is to introduce to all the book lovers out there, the wonderful discworld series in it's new cover art~
A wonderfuly funny series that should not be taken too seriously, but is indeed a reflection of modern society. Discworld is our earth twisted with the comic genius of Pratchet. A world so vastly different from ours yet being the familiar places and people at the same time, defies logic, yet Pratchet does exactly that.
Gavin
pondered @ 18:54
