Precocious. Little. Clover. Devil

Tuesday, May 30, 2006
Pictures

24 May: Pinchas Zukerman Live at the Esplanade Classical concert mind you =)

The little ones. =3

2 gents and a lady. Lady's camera shy.I shall name them Lilith, Abel and Bandit

Gavin pondered @ 21:08

Sunday, May 28, 2006
meme replies + Happy Post (attempted)

Wow! Quite a large response, so I'll add more details in later, in the mean time, I'll rush these up ASAP.

Ying Mei

1. Pocky Queen who wants to be a tai-tai
2. Be spontaneous
3.

4. Unique! Intelligent, witty and funny. I like talking to you about the little "philosophies of life", haven't had much of those lately though.
5. Cat-bell Choker!
6. A lazy, pampered cat. =p
7. What made you want to be my friend?

Marc

1. Keep making me think of an "arbiter" xp
2. Organize a 4-8 class outing!
3. Red
4. Being my classroom buddy for 2 years! You're really a great person to talk to, and tolerating all my nonsense... haha
5. I thought you had a really cool name when I first met you.
6. Camel
7. Did you ever manage to snag that girl you told me about in december?

Jac

1. The wicked witch of the west she is!
2. Speak louder, you sound like a mouse
3. Black
4. I like your view of the world. it's much more artistic, and untainted by commercialism than the rest of the people I know.
5. You do SM
6. Butterfly... wait! Mouse.
7. Do you always dig into people's pasts?

Sherman

1. Watches and likes One piece
2. Shorten your MSN nick
3. White
4. Sticking by your beliefs with conviction, even when it's quite impossible to find women who don't drink or club.
5. Likes nattou
6. Sheep dog =)
7. Do you hate the world?

----------

Oh! I finally understood where the holy hand grenade came from. It's from Monty Python's Holy Grail! Damn it was funny!After a 4 DVD marathon an Nick's place (Monty Python's Holy Grail, Now For Something Completely Different and The Meaning of Life, plus The nightmare Before Christmas). It's funny shit I tell you.

i'm also supposed to post up pictures of the concert by the Singapore Symphony Ochestra on wednesday, but my phone's not cooperating, and is refusing the connection to my computer.

(This happy thing is pretty hard. Mei... Can I have a lifeline?)

Happy, happy, happy... Hmm. I shall have to try harder for the next post.

Gavin pondered @ 16:35

Saturday, May 27, 2006
meme

From Mei's

Comment with your name, and:

1. I'll respond with something random about you.
2. I'll challenge you to try something.
3. I'll pick a color that I associate with you.
4. I'll tell you something I like about you.
5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you.
6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. I'll ask you something I've always wanted to ask you.
8. If I do this for you, you must post this on yours

As part of Mei's challenge, I shall have to attempt to write a happy entry. =)

Let's see, First of all, I shall reiterate how much I love any and everything that glows in the dark. It never ceases to amaze me, especially the thought of the little object, shining with its own light in the darkness. A beacon of hope, a symbol of resilence, and just like holding a star in your hand.

I become really happy when people give me a present that glows in the dark. Well, I feel happy whenever someone gives me something too, but I'm a little bad at expressing it.

Okay I'm really sleepy... This one's not counted, but I promise to try harder tomorrow.

Gavin pondered @ 12:04

Tuesday, May 23, 2006
Poem

Guns for hire, sitting in a row
To be picked by the highest bidder.
Stone faced minions, without much goal
Where they go, what they do, doesn't really matter.
They only hear, they only know, a wish for blood and adventure.

Souls for rent, people used for brutish ends
They live to serve, to serve only
Knowing to question their sanity, but when?
Mired in ceaseless folly
Their strength, they're weak, lost in a pointless venture.

Why did they choose this path,
How did they accept this fate?
Half fate, half forced by unrelentless influences.
Why do they persist in this silly wait?

Silly, silly, dumb.
Just to find a little peace or a place of their own.
Lying exploiting, they do not think their owners' at fault.
Who's to say they're wrong?

Try to save everyone you meet
They fill your hands, and fall back into the chasm.
Try to save the one who matters
Then you'll only get the burnt of hurt.
When will it occur that the wrong thing is being done?

When?

Gavin pondered @ 20:11

Monday, May 22, 2006
Greenhouse

”???????“
A flower in the greenhouse.

Am I one too?

Still protected in a microcosm thinking it's the world.

I have much to learn, much to learn. walking the walk, hopefully not straight into a wall.

Gavin pondered @ 19:34

Friday, May 19, 2006
Cats

The problem with cats. Trust.

Cats let people shower them with attention, but that's not trust.

Why? Don't ask why. When a cat has problem trusting another cat, how can one expect it to trust any other thing?

When two cats walk side by side, that's not trust, that's just a need for a companion. Maybe cats would like to trust each other, but that's not in their nature. They would always be on their guard, they would try to keep the other around, but never really letting the other in. That's why you hardly see cats walk together.

You see, cats are proud animals, and won't admit their need for company. However, they do need it. On its own, it can run of to people, people willing to give it food, milk and shelter. So will the other cat. The cat receives whatever is showered upon it.

Sometimes, some cats forget themselves and beocme subjugated. Convinced that they are the human's pets. Those cats are sad.

They have forgotten themselves, but never forget that no one owns a cat but itself.

But you see, cats are such intriguing creatures.

I am quite sure that if 2 cats can let each other in, they will find salvation from the pathetic plight they feel they're in.

Though I also think it's quite impossible given their nature.

Cats...

Gavin pondered @ 20:54

Tuesday, May 16, 2006
Sleep

Eels - I need some sleep

I need some sleep.
You can’t go on like this.
I try counting sheep,
But there’s one I always miss.

Everyone says, "I’m getting down too low"
Everyone says, "You just gotta let it go"
You just gotta let it go
You just gotta let it go

I need some sleep
time to put the old horse down
I’m in too deep
and the wheels keep spinning round

Everyone says, "I’m getting down too low"
Everyone says, "You just gotta let it go"
You just gotta let it go
You just gotta let it go

You just gotta let it go
You just gotta let it go
You just gotta let it go

Gavin pondered @ 23:25

Sunday, May 14, 2006
Murphy's Law

There is always someone at tha particular shelf where the CD you're looking for is on.

And there, my personal contribution to the annexes of the Chaos Theory.

Murphy's Law. Demonstartes the power of narration and relative observation.

Relative observation. That is to record an event with a preconceived anticipation of a relation or trend.

Gavin pondered @ 21:55

Friday, May 12, 2006
2 songs

I wanted to shout at Amanda for sending me this.

>>People Watching<<

Jack Johnson

Well I’m just people watching, the other people watching me
We’re all people watching, the other people watching we

We’re as lonely as we want it to be
We’re all as lonely as we want it to be
Just as lonely as we want it to be
I’m just you, you’re just me
It’s only true, if we believe

Well there really ain’t no use in stopping
What nobody never told me not to do
So I’ll keep people watching
Watching me now
Finding my way back to you

We’re as lonely as we want it to be
We’re all as lonely as we want it to be
I’m just as lonely as we want it to be
I’m just you, you’re just me
It’s only, true if we believe

I see so many feet going so many ways
People passing by they got nothing to say
On our own just watching and confused
Well if nobody told me what to do
I guess I’m breaking all the rules

Well I’m just people watching the other people watching me
We’re all people watching the other people watching we

We’re as lonely as we want it to be
We’re not so lonely as we want it to be
I’m just as lonely as I want it to be
Not so lonely
Lonely
Lonely
Lonely
Lonely
Lonely
Lonely

Then I realized I was angry that it hit right on.

How come I always misunderstand people. Probably because I'm always pretending all day. No wonder.

Didn't get into either NUS nor SMU. Feeling really crummy. Feeling unhappy about myself. Walking along Funan struggling not to blow it on a new PS2 just for the sake of playing Kingdom Hearts II.

The world's suffocating, and I can't say a thing, becuase I don't know how to. Wondering how $4000 is going to last me through University without begging from my parents.

Strolling around the world thnking I don't want any part of these people's lives, except for the select few I deem worthy. Then I begrudge them for not fulfilling my unrealistic expectations. Thinking of choices, decisions, and double guessing. Rationalizing only to end up irrationally indecisive.

Sitting there with tunneled vision, focusing on one thing, and letting the world just pass me by. Fearful of losing it, not knowing everything else is being lost.

Doubting my own abilities, and questioning my resolve. Coming to conclude I make a bad leader, or maybe I'm not cut out to lead at all.

Then I heard this song.

>>Happy<<

Meleni Smith

Landlord's knocking at my door
Cussing me out
Got laid off my job the night before
I can't feel how
I'm gonna fix tomorrow and
Yes today's still a mess
Can you tell me what's the point then?
It all seems meaningless
Wish that I could step away and breathe
This world's trying to swallow me
Clear away the clouds inside my head

Someone just tell me that it's okay now
What are you worrying about?
Got my dreams, got my life, got my love
Got my friends, got the sunshine above
Why am I making this hard on myself
When there's so many beautiful reasons I have to be happy
[Happy, happy? Happy]

(People lie) People lie
People hide (People hide)
People cry (People cry)
People fight and they don't know why
If fear is all that we should fear
Then what are we so afraid of?
Cause fear is only in our heads
So why do we let it control us?
Fear makes me forget how sweet the simple things in life really are
Fear makes me believe that I'm alone

Someone please say that it's okay now
What are you worrying about?
Got my dreams, got my life, got my love
Got my friends, got the sunshine above
Why am I making this hard on myself
When there's so many beautiful reasons I have to be happy

Any day I'll go mad thinking that
As long as it gets me the world wants to fight me
Preparing to battle an enemy I'm seeing
During my stressin' I'm blinded to the lessons
That could be of lesson if I'd be confessing
That the enemy who's trying to be
Is hiding inside of me, ohhh

But it's okay now (It's okay)
What am I worrying about?
Got my dreams, got my life, got my love
Got my friends, got the sunshine above
Why am I making this hard on myself
When there's so many beautiful reasons I have to be happy

Got my dreams, got my life, got my love
Got my friends, got the sunshine above
Why am I making this hard on myself
When there's so many beautiful reasons I have to be happy
[Happy, happy? Happy]

And all of a sudden, I yearn for a certain simplicity. Even if it's a tad meaningless.

Gavin pondered @ 18:45

Monday, May 08, 2006
Post Elections

With the elections over and the storm abating, we're all left to slowly ease back into normalcy. Some events have been downright hilarious, and others played to the point it became dreary.

I won't forget the "Bak Chor Mee" Podcast from Mr.Brown, brilliant comedy. Listen to it: The Persistently Non-Political Podcast no.6

So, 82/84 again.

I must profess I have heard and learnt a great many things in this period of time. I wasn't eligible to vote (They think I'm too darn young), but I was rather intrigued by it all.

The point is, Singapore does not want to step into a renaissance world. People in the country are still concerned about their survival, and being in the midst of the crowd at the rallies I attended, I could feel that.

They don't want art. No. They need job security, they need a promise of a future, who know not of a "master" plan to step into a cultured society.

The avant garde, the young, we can have our ideals, but the bottom line is, there are a million other people who need to be fed.

which further emphasizes the point that Singapore needs great commanders to pave the way with their vision and ideas, and good leaders to make sure that these are met, whilst ensuring the people are happy.

now we seem to only have a slew of misguided people who don't believe in or trust the government.

Which leads me to think. Politicians? Do they be, beacuse they want to be, or do they be because they are needed? Or are they simply because they are trained and groomed?

Gavin pondered @ 21:23

Sunday, May 07, 2006
One Rochester

Gavin pondered @ 20:25

Thursday, May 04, 2006
Songs, songs.

Who else here feels that the old songs are starting to sound really nice to you?

I heard Sukiyaki (it's actually called Ue wo muite in Japan) being played during lunch and I bagan listing out the songs that I enjoy. "Listen to the Rythmn of the Falling Rain", "Hey Jude", "I can see clearly", "Don't worry be happy".

Speaking of songs, they're not just about the music, not just about the lyrics, they are an amalgamation of both and more. Sometimes, a song is special because it has special significance, secret connotations that only the esoteric few will comprehend.

There's songs that I absolutely love, yet, there's no explanation for that inkling. Forexample, japanese songs. I like quite very many of them. The ever delectable LA LA LA LA Love Song is a favourite, but there is one point. I do not profess to understand Japanese. Something is magical about that song that draws me to it. Even after 10 years, it still sounds so sweet. Not until recently did I bother to check the lyrics, and found out, that it is quite a sweet song too.

Another song, that had a profound effect on me, as SMAP's Sekai ni Hitotsu Dake no Hana. I liked it very much, and the lyrics, until I checked, actually made me feel how it was supposed to. Without knowing the words, I felt the song.

That's what makes a powerful song. A song that reaches to your heart despite seemingly impossible barriers (language).

Afterall, the world does move in mysterious ways.

Gavin pondered @ 21:16

Monday, May 01, 2006
Dialogue called Incongruous

A empty room, an empty void with nothing but 2 chairs, and two people. But this is no odinary room.

Black: Hey, are you perfect?

White: I don't know. I don't think so, but I probably am.

Black: I think you are not. You just like to appear so, a little facade that you choose to present to the world. What are you, really?

White: I am but who I am.

The room begins to shift. They now stand on opposite walls of the room.

Black: Simple you claim, but look, now you stand high up on the ceiling.

White: But I am not. It is you who stands on the ceiling.

Black: (Ponders the possibility.) That might be true. Yes you have a point. It is true that I might be the one who stands on the ceiling. After all, I profess to be a rather complex thing. However, consider this! Could it be that we both are standing neither on ground nor roof, but only on the walls at the side?

White: What nonsense you speak! (Produces a little book) It is written here in this little book I have, that I stand on ground. Naturally, you must be standing up on the top.

Black: Is that so? Why, can I ask, is that book expounding the undisputed truth?

White: I think that since it is written, therefore it must be. Don't you think?

Black: I don't think so. The book merely suggest does it not? Look I shall walk round all of them for you. (Proceeds to traverse all 6 sides, and stopping at the one before.) See?

White: You can do that, you wilful spirit, but I shall fail if I try.

Black: (Sits on the chair) Is it? Have you tried?

White: (Shakes head) Not yet.

Black: Why not?

White: I don't want to.

Black: But if you don't, you will never know.

White: But if I don't I won't fall.

Black: I see. I shall not compel you further. (Glances down/up at White) I apologize.

White: You don't have to.

5 minutes of silence.

Black: I don't understand you.

White: I don't understand you either.

(White appears on the same wall as Black)

White: Don't worry.

Gavin pondered @ 09:57